Monday, June 8, 2009

Crap

Jayda: "Mom, did you know that I have 3 kids?
Me: "You do? Wow. You must be busy."
Jayda: "Yes, I'm verrrry busy. I have to take them on field trips and stuff."
Me: "Oh yea, where are you taking them?"
Jayda: "To the North Pole. We're going to go and kick it with Santa Clause (and yes, she said "kick it").
Me: "Well, that sounds fun."
Jayda: "Yup. I'm gonna take all three of them there. Their names are Niche, Grace, and Crap."
Me: "You named one of your kids crap?"
Jayda: "Yup. She's nice. She's not a brat...she's just crap."

And that my friends, is a shining example of my wonderful parenting skills!

Monday, June 1, 2009

Sweet Bella - 11 Weeks


Update: She cries ALL day. She's actually horse sounding right now from screaming so much. Has reflux really bad. Projectile Vomits. Doesn't sleep well (if at all). She rests in her car seat instead of a bed because she's happier when shes propped up. She often smells like sour milk because she can't keep anything down, she goes through about 50 diapers a day (okay, I'm allowed to exaggerate since I'm going on 2 hours of sleep)! HOWEVER...she has a smile that will melt your heart. She coos and sings for her papa. She has a big dimple that is too cute for words. She loves to snuggle on your neck. Shes happy when she's being held by her mommy. Her eyes get huge and happy when her daddy walks in a room. She LOVES to pull up a chair to the milk bar (if you get my drift), she smiles HUGE for her big sister, and she is truly the perfect addition to our family! She is perfect...smelly milk vomit and all!!

I was bored...so I went blonde. And yes, they really do have more fun!!


Kids Say the Darndest...

On Jayda's last day of preschool I was talking with her teacher. She tells me that Jayda is doing really well with sounding out her words and learning to read. I tell her teacher that my goal for the summer is to start some basic reading with Jayda. Miss Elizabeth shows me some of the flash cards that the kids have been working on.

Miss Elizabeth: "See, most of the kids are learning these words." (She shows me the cards and they say "dog," "cat," and "car."
Me: "Oh, that's great."
Miss Elizabeth: "Yes, some of the more advanced kids are learning this word." (she shows me the card and the word is "Fossil."
Me: "Cool. Which is Jayda comfortable with?"
Miss Elizabeth: "This is what Jayda is working on right now." (She hands me the card and the word is......."Paleontologist.")

____________________

Jayda:" Mom, I sure had fun today playing in the water fountain at Fairfax Corner."
Me: "Yeah, me too Jayda. It felt good to be outside."
Jayda: "Yup. I loved it. I realized I need more sun in my life."

____________________

I took Jayda to get her first manicure/pedicure at the nail salon for the wedding she was in. All of the women working there were speaking in Vietnamese.
Jayda (really loudly): "Hey mom...are they speaking Spanish?"
Me: "No baby, they are speaking Vietnamese."
Jayda: "Oh. Can you tell them to stop?"

____________________

Jayda: "Mom, is Jesus real?"
Me: "Yes, Jesus is real."
Jayda: "Like really real?"
Me: "Yes, he's really real."
Jayda: "Can he come over and play?"
Me: "Not exactly." Before I could explain myself she says...
Jayda: "Oh, is it because he is old and has a beard like daddy?"

____________________

I was a bridesmaid in a wedding and Jayda was a flower girl. As I was being escorted down the aisle by one of the groomsmen during the rehearsal, Jayda ran over and said, "Mom, are you holding his arm." I told her yes and that he was walking me down the aisle for the wedding." Jayda said, "but, but, but, but, but." Then she paused for about 20 seconds and thought about it and then said, "but, but, but," and then she just glared at the poor guy! It was the first time I can remember that Jayda was truly speechless. She was obviously ticked off that it wasn't her daddy I was holding onto, but she didn't know what to say. She was so confused and pissed that she just kept repeating "but" and staring at us like we were two evil aliens! Too funny!!